The mice have been at my tits. Luckily I wasn't wearing them at the time (I haven't had an opportunity to express my Susie side for months) or else it might have been even messier, or involved a lot more screaming. At least, I assume it was mice from the scattered filling on the floor and chewed bag.
Without the benefit of shapewear and padding, Susie has all the contours and curvature of a broom handle, with not even enough natural - or easily fakeable - décolletage to fill even a modest 34A bra. If I want a bit of projection out front (and who doesn't?) some artifice is therefore required.
While I was only dressing at home, early experiments with water filled balloons provided a gratifying weight and bounce, although two or three soggy accidents suggested this was not a good look if I wanted to take things outdoors. Pop socks filled with birdseed (or in my case pearl barley) was the next solution and while less bouncy they work reasonably well, especially inside a slightly padded bra.
I had noticed a small amount of - er- leakage the last time I wore them, but put it down to the wear and tear of being stuffed into a push up T-shirt bra time and again.
I also knew we had a mouse in the study. I'd seen something small and dark scuttle across the floor one morning. We caught it in a humane trap and released it back into the wild at the bottom of the road. I never thought to check the spare room where Susie's stuff is stored away until this morning when I found my boobs, and the bag I store them in, had been chewed though and the contents all over the carpet. Luckily I still had the remainder of the packet to effect a hasty reconstruction.
The trap has been duly moved into the spare room in case the culprit (if it wasn't the same one) is still there and nesting in Susie's unmentionables. It's probably time to have a good clear out there as well while I am at it.
S
Well that is an interesting problem ! I hope that was the only damage it did. I have seen the occasional moth in my cupboard, but that's the only threat to my clothes i've had so far :)
ReplyDeleteHope it didn't' have to many friends :)
As the weather changes, I guess the chances for unwanted guests are going to increase. I hope the trap does the job and you're soon mouse free.
ReplyDeleteSorry you've had this strife with those naughty nipple nibblers. Personally, I keep a mousetrap in my cleavage at all times. This swiftly deals both with any pesky mice and with the wandering hands of any male admirers. Sue x
ReplyDeleteCaught and evicted. Hopefully just the one, but I'll rebait the trap in case.
ReplyDeleteSue's idea of a mousetrap in the cleavage duly noted, though male admirers may be a rare breed.
And a second today. So not just one mouse, but meeces.
ReplyDeleteI hate meeces to pieces!
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